It is not in my character to comment on private matters publicly. Contrary to the popular belief, I am a very private person and I treasure privacy more than anything else. Suffice to say, it has not been easy to cope with the demand of my party work that requires me to be in public space.
But I have been getting a lot of messages lately asking me to be extra careful. I truly appreciate it though at times I may appear to be amused by the whole thing. I could have appeared to be careless with the way I go about things especially my daily routines, so I am not at all surprised that people are concerned with my seemingly lack of attention to security details.
Given this backdrop, I feel like it is only polite to pen my thoughts if only to persuade my good friends that all are OK. People say we speak our mind, but we always write our heart. So this is what my heart feels.
My elders used to tell me that there is a fine line between bravery and foolishness, chivalry and a folly. Growing up, bravery did not rank top in my list of virtues precisely because a brave person can sometimes be the most foolish. Hence my amusement when at times, people ask what makes a person brave enough to ignore the threats and personal risks involved to stay in my line of job. It was certainly not bravery for I do not know bravery.
But I know right and wrong (or at least I believe so); and I know duty. Most importantly, I know the conviction that this life is a temporal being and a transient journey. Each of our deed in this life is nothing but a piece of life mosaic thereafter.
So the only choice that we have is to try to live a righteous life as we deem fit, leaving the endless possibilities of what can go wrong to Allah’s Ultimate Judgement and Mercy. Each of His gifts to us is a test – a bountiful of wealth is indeed a greater test than a pauper’s hunger.
And this is my test: I can’t ignore my conscience if I feel I may be able to make a little difference to the people around me. Let others judge us as a fool to follow our conscience because it is not in the realm of men to pass the ultimate judgement.
In times like this, I am always reminded of Tolkien’s great words, spoken by Gandalf that while we may have the greatest concerns of what may lie ahead, all we have to decide is what to do with the time given to us.
And so my friends; please be at ease knowing that I will be extra vigilant. What can or may happen is beyond us. I only ask for prayers while I enjoy every bit of this adventure 🙂